The Real Reason Good Friendships Are So Hard To Come By: Guest Post

Anxious but trying is the motto of my life! I think I’m okay most of
the time after these ridiculous evening self-talks.
Talking to oneself and setting matters straight with one’s heart
matters more because at the end of the day, nobody else gives a damn
about you and how you’re going to feel no matter how open you are to
Sometimes I think I need to talk out loud inside a room.
Because sometimes you see, you are your best person.
There, I said it.

I am a poor judge of people.
Even more when it comes to recognizing a solid friend.
Of course, to have good friends you have to be a good friend.
It means showing up.
If you never text back and you cancel every get-together…you will not
get back deep friendship.
It means making sacrifices. Friendship requires sacrifice.

It means pursuing.
It means sending texts to check in on them about that thing they were
worried about. It means grabbing a memory and making a quick call
telling them you’re thinking of them. It means asking them to meet up
for a glass of wine on a sunny afternoon.
It means texting back when you’re almost asleep and telling them you
miss them.
I think it’s important to make sacrifices for the friends that you
choose. Maybe that means meeting up with them when you don’t feel like
it. Maybe it’s doing something you don’t want to do to help them
It means choosing.
Well, you cannot give the same level of friendship to everyone. You have
to choose the people you are going to give your heart to.
Good friends don’t-
1. Stay too busy for you, too long.
2. Listen to what you have to say, solely for responding with a
ready-made solution.
3. Don’t show you negativity and do negative talk about your bad
4. Allow fearful thoughts to navigate your brain for long.
5. Show off to you that they are perfect.
6. Tell you that they have limited time for you or that they have to
struggle to make time for you.
7. Blame you or complain about you or compare you to other friends and
8. Don’t just talk about loving yourself more, as a motto but show you
why you are so damn lovable and cherished.
There are certain people who make the world a better place just by being
in it. They seem to carry the strongest glue around with them. And
sometimes, we just wish to drown ourselves in the feels they give us.
Those are the ones I think reside in our hearts forever.
How can we be these angels and good friends to others –
1. It costs nothing to be a very sweet and kind person. All you gotta do
is to be a kind-hearted person. That’s all.
2. Good friends treat you well, are super loyal, and are incredibly
protective of the ones they trust and love.
4. Most of them can be a little standoffish when you first get to meet
them, but that’s only because they don’t like letting anyone in.
Once they do open up, though, they are a bundle of love.
5. Again and again, they are compassionate and kind and their loyalty to
loved ones is unmatched.
6. You don’t hesitate to talk to them. With them, you just know you
are not alone.
7. You don’t worry about being vulnerable with them.
8. You just wouldn’t know what to do without them. Period.
9. They always, always listen to you and always notice what you are
going through.
10. They are respectful.
11. They compliment you a lot and some of them are great huggers.
12. They dress you up in confidence all the time.

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It’s definitely okay to choose the people you invest in; sometimes
spending enough time with a friend opens your eyes to existing
realities. Perhaps you overstayed in a relationship. Sometimes and often
times, they would not know how to communicate a lack of space in their
hearts for you.
We all need this. Safe friendships. We just weren’t meant to travel
this life alone and in my opinion, there’s no time we need each other
more than as we grow older and lonelier.

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